Thursday, September 30, 2010

Your Freudian Nightmare of the Night has a craving for chicken

 Oh look, a bunch of turkeys acting like chickens

This one's a little bit of a disappointment, honestly, when I first saw it, I thought it was going to be some bizarre form of human cockfighting. Sadly, it was just a bunch of losers doing a chicken dance.

(via Friends of the Program)

Is Purdue cursed by makeover of Purdue Pete?

Purdue's athletic programs have been ravaged by injuries since the start of the year. This includes the season-ending injuries to Purdue men's basketball star Robbie Hummel, and now starting quarterback Robert Marve.
Is there something sinister behind all of this schadenfreude at Purdue? Some are pointing out that the injuries started racking up when school decided it was time to give Freudian nightmare-inducing semi-official mascot Purdue Pete a makeover to make him less Freudian nightmarish. It seems he was scaring the children way too much.
The new, safe-for-children version for Purdue Pete is scheduled to be unveiled in the Spring of 2011. Until then, no male athlete's ACL or MCL is safe. Hide your forwards, hide your quarterbacks.

(via Purdue Outsider, Hammer and Rails)

Dawgageddon: Yellow streak down Georgia's back growing

Earlier this week Georgia canceled a home-and-home series against Oregon. The reason given was that new Georgia athletic director Greg McGarity favors a seven home games a year schedule. And dropping a trip to Oregon helps him achieve that.
Now word come out that Georgia agreed to future games with teams from the FCS. The Dawgs will play Charleston Southern in 2014, and Georgia Southern in 2016. In other words, Georgia fans who pay through the nose for season tickets will have to pay loads of money to see UGA play low-caliber opponents at home.
And don't expect it to get any better. Because playing actual BCS contenders outside of the SEC doesn't seem to be in McGarity's interest. He thinks Georgia's SEC schedule and Georgia Tech are strong enough to be BCS contenders every year.
What the move really says is that Georgia is backsliding again. Becoming a team that once again rarely leaves the friendly confines of the South to play a regular season football game. No longer will UGA have the guts to go to and play relevant programs like Arizona and Oklahoma State. And Mark Richt seems to be okay with this.
"Playing that kind of game does draw attention," Richt said. "It does get you on the other side of the country, but do we really recruit over there? We really don’t."
It's sad to say this, but Mark Richt has officially lost his manhood. And judging from McGarity's comments, he possibly never had any. McGarity's a coward if he doesn't want to see Georgia play quality non-SEC opponents. And he makes Georgia look cowardly in not playing them. It might as well replace UGA with a poodle.

(via Athens Banner-Herald)

Wednesday, September 29, 2010

Covering Dixie Like Mildew: SEC Heisman Watch, Urban Meyer, and Finebaum needs to shut up...again

The Usual Suspects. The SEC's best chances for the Heisman Trophy are mostly who you think they would be: Mark Ingram (Alabama), Ryan Mallett (Arkansas), Cam Newton (Auburn), Patrick Peterson (LSU), and Trey Burton (Florida). (Athens Banner-Herald)

Speaking of Patrick Peterson, there's a chance that LSU may use him on the offense. (ESPN)

Speaking of Mark Ingram, Tony Barnhart was wrong about Ingram's chances of a Hesiman repeat. Because he said so. (Mr. College Football)

Speaking of Ryan Mallett, the overrated Arkansas QB's fake on Twitter is recovering from the Hawgs collapse against Alabama by heading to Mexico. Hide your niñas, hide your esposa. (Friends of the Program)

Field of Dreams. A look at Urban Meyer's minor league baseball career. (Lost Letterman, Dr. Saturday)

Paul Finebaum says "Alabama and Florida is college football's most important rivalry." If it were that important, they'd play each other every year during the season. Instead, 'Bama gets Tennessee as its intterdivision rival, and Florida gets LSU. Shut up, Paul. (

The SEC should be looking at TCU as a member

There are rumors going around that the Big East is talking to TCU about joining the much maligned BCS conference. The obvious benefit for TCU is the Big East's automatic BCS bid for it's championship team. It also lets the Horned Frogs thumb their nose at Boise St. and the Mountain West, pretty much leaving blowing their chances to up their combined dreams of BCS social climbing in the dust.
TCU and the Big East do seem to be a good fit, but the Big E still faces the looming possibility of getting raided by the Big 10. That could seriously hamstring its status as a legitimate football conference.
It's at this point that another conference seriously needs to be looking at adding TCU as a member: The SEC. The conference seemed seriously earlier in the year of inviting Texas A&M as its 13th member. In reality, TCU would be a better option. The Horned Frogs are a program on the rise, as opposed to TAMU. The Aggies have been on the downward spiral for years, and do not seem to be getting any better.
I wrote earlier this year that the SEC needed to be more American Idol than The Celeberty Apprentice. Meaning that it should be looking at potential member schools that are on the rise than schools that are looking at reviving their flagging football programs. TCU definitely fits the American Idol category. It's already been to one BCS bowl, (which is one more BCS bowl or championship game than half the SEC). There are more benefits to TCU than Texas A&M, such as a larger market in the Dallas Ft. Worth area. And not having to deal with the continuing Freudian nightmare that Texas A&M exists in. (The Texas A&M Corps of the Cadets may be the best argument for keeping the "Don't Ask Don't Tell" policy. Seriously) Plus, the SEC would have the upper hand in the negotiations, with the ability to set its terms for TCU's membership. That wouldn't happen with a Texas or Oklahoma, both of which would probably want to bring along a ton of baggage (i.e. other Big XII schools).
TCU is a team on the rise, but could hit a brick wall as a member of the Big East. It could possibly do better in the SEC. And the SEC would benefit from having TCU as a member more than any of the Big XII schools. Its a partnership the SEC seriously needs to look at. 

(via Fox Sports Southwest)

Crossing the Atlantic: Earth, WInd, and Fire edition

(Crossing the Atlantic is a look at the ACC and other schools on the East Coast.) 
 Tiger's on Ice? The idea that Clemson's offensive line might be a little thin when it comes to the depth chart. Recruiting issues in recent years haven't helped things much. (

Wake Forest's Tanner Price up in the air? A concussion recieved in the loss to FSU last Saturday could keep quarterback Tanner Price in the upcoming home game against Georgia Tech. (ESPN)

Georgia Tech on fire? After losing to NC State, Georgia Tech head coach Paul Johnson wants the Yellow Jackets to play like "their hair's on fire." Cue the Crazy World of Arthur Brown... (Atlanta Journal-Constitution)

Boston College's bowl aspirations come down to earth? If the current bowl predictions are correct, Boston College could see itself playing Georgia in the Franklin American Mortgage Music City Bowl. At least the part about Boston College playing in Nashville around New Year's  could happen. (BC Interruption)

Tuesday, September 28, 2010

Tyrod Taylor brings us a story of a football player and a cell phone not involving death threats

Just when you think idiots like Chris Rainey have jaded you when it comes to athletes and modern communications technology, along comes a story to prove that there is still hope out there. Virginia Tech quarterback Tyrod Taylor's father, Rodney Taylor was stopped in an airport by a family of Hokie fans who recognized him. One of the family's children, an eight year-old boy, was concerned for the younger Taylor's health after the game.
Rodney Taylor proceeded to call Tyrod  on his cell phone to let the boy hear from his idol personally that he would be all right, and was ready for this Saturday's game against NC State.
After hearing about the nasty "Time to die" incident, it's awesome to hear that sometimes athletes and cell phones can mix to make the world a better place.

(via, Gobbler Country)

Dawgageddon: Georgia canceling Oregon series another sign in backward trend.

Georgia was scheduled to play a home-and-home series against Oregon in 2015 and 2016. That was until it was scrapped Monday by new Georgia athletic director Greg McGarity. The move comes at a time when the football program is a chaos filled with a three-game losing streak, multiple arrests, and A.J. Green's jersey-selling suspension.
It's also a sign of a program that is losing the forward motion it had gathered in the previous few years. After a bit of a letdown following the Greene-Pollack years, UGA football seemed to be getting back on track. The team seemed to be willing to play higher profile games outside the SEC, such as Arizona and Oklahoma State. And in 2007, the Dawgs has started to develop a bit of a swagger. That was the year the Bulldog Nation will remember for the black jerseys, the now-infamous "touchdown celebration" in the game against Florida, and exposing Hawaii and Colt Brennan in the Sugar Bowl.
Then 2008 happened. And with it came the embarrassing loss to Alabama in those same black jerseys. 2009, followed with a loss to Oklahoma State and the black helmets in yet another loss to Florida.
After the Florida loss , then-AD Damon Evans shied away from any more alternate uniforms.
Now with the schadenfreude falling out of the sky, and a potentially embarrassing chance of losing to Colorado,  McGarrity decides to scrap the series against Oregon. McGarity claims it's because he wants to see Georgia play seven home games a year, and going out to Eugene would be too much for the team. It sounds like UGA running away from a strong Pac-10 team.
Canceling the Oregon series is another sign of the backward direction Georgia is going in. It now looks like the program is headed straight to 1994. Not many Bulldog supporters are going to approve of that.

(via Atlanta Journal-Constitution)

Penn State's Pittsburgh radio home is becoming a Mickey Mouse organization.

ESPN 1250, the Pittsburgh, PA radio station that serves as the flagship station for Penn State football, is dropping local programming and will reportedly be changing formats at the end of the year.  It's switching from sports talk to, of all things, Radio Disney.
So instead of Mike and Mike and Colin Cowherd, the Nittany Lions will be sharing the airwaves with Justin Beiber and  Miley Cyrus. Not that Penn State fans are going to mind the change. They'll probably won't even notice the difference .

(via Black Shoe Diaries, Black Heart Gold Pants)

Monday, September 27, 2010

Covering Dixie Like Mildew: Chris Rainey, Georgia, and more.

Avoiding the gavel. Florida's Chris Rainey won't be facing prosecution for the "Time to die" text message to his girlfriend after a deal with the State Attorney's office. But he won't be on the field for the Gatora against Alabama. (Gator Sports/The Gainesville Sun)

"Georgia is just not very good." Because Tony Barnhart said so. (Mr. College Football)

You can forget that trip to Eugene, Dawg fans. Georgia and Oregon cancel 2015 & 2016 home and home games. (Atlanta Journal-Constitution)

If LSU is 4-0, why are fans booing? It could be the way the Tigers are winning more with string and chewing gum than than with on-the-field domination. (Dr. Saturday)

Is Cam Newton the new Mark Ingram? Auburn's Cam Newton is emerging as a Heisman candidate. The trouble is, the last year's Heisman winner Mark Ingram is looking for a repeat. (

Sunday, September 26, 2010

Meet America's new favorite pooch: The Boise State Kickoff tee dog.

No America, you're eyes weren't deceiving you. Boise State had a dog retrieving it's kickoff tee from the football field.

And for the record, the dog's name is Cecil. And here's his trainer to tell you all about him.

Blue football field. Sneaky trick plays. Kickoff tee retrieving dog. And Broncos fans wonder why they don't get a lot of BCS love. But at least they've got another new meme to go along with Cowbell Girl:

(via KTVB, EDSBS' Twitter feed)

Dawgageddeon: What's Mark Richt thinking?

"I picked up Greg McGarity's iPhone. Why does he have Chris Petersen's agent on speed dial?"

"Mississippi State has a million cowbells, and I'm stuck with one ding-a-ling...A.J. Green"

"Make that two ding-a-lings. Almost forgot about Mike Bobo."
 "The Redcoat Marching Band was playing "Hot in Here" before the game. I've got to ask the band director about that. "

"I wonder if Sonny Seiler could teach UGA VIII to fetch the tee like Boise State Tee Dog can?."

"Loran Smith tried to cheer me up and told me about this "Keep Mark Richt" website he'd heard about. I didn't have the heart to tell him it was set up by a Gator Fan."

"Gotta remember to remind Dr. Adams that I'm pretty much the reason he wasn't ran out of town when he fired Vince Dooley."

"Had that dream about Christian Ponder last night. Gotta stop thinking about whether I should've stayed at FSU or not."

"Willie Martinez keeps leaving me messages about how things are going out in Stanford."

"A.J. Green asked me for who he should do a paper on for history class. I suggested Vidkun Quisling."

"Dr. Adams has Chris Petersen's agent on speed dial too. What's that all about?"

Saturday, September 25, 2010

Ryan Mallett isn't merely off the Ryan List...


As coroner I examined Mallett.
And he's not only merely off the Ryan List,
He's really most sincerely off the Ryan List!

Alabama struggled early on, but in the end, the Tide finished off Arkansas like they were Sunday dinner at Dreamland.  Maybe it's a little too soon for 'Bama to make hotel preparations for the BCS Championship in Glendale, AZ just yet, but it's doubtful that there's will be another SEC team taking that spot.

Friday, September 24, 2010

Iowa Hawkeyes go back to the future with a Black Heart and Old Pants.

The Iowa Hawkeyes will be trying to rebound after last week's loss to Arizona by facing Ball State on Saturday. And they'll be doing so in retro uniforms honoring the 1958 Hawkeye squad. Here's some behind the scenes video about the unis form Iowa TV station KCRG9.

(apologies for the title to Adam Jacobi and the Black Heart Gold Pants gang.)

(via Black Heart Gold PantsKCRG9)

Covering Dixie Like Mildew: Alabama, Ryan Mallett, Aaron Murray, and more

From the "all but official" department. Alabama will face Michigan at Cowboy's Stadium in 2012. according to Nick Saban. (

And from the "Could you be a little more vague?" department. Saban also mentioned that Alabama "also will play games in Atlanta in 2013 and 2014 against Atlantic Coast Conference opponents." Which could mean another trip or trips to the Chick-Fil-A Kickoff Game, or finally getting around to that game with Georgia Tech. (

Why doesn't Alabama play Boise State? A new article claims that "Boise State hasn't tried to tried to schedule 'Bama." Funny, I don't see Alabama seriously trying to schedule the Broncos, either. (

"Is it just me, or did that pizza delivery boy look like Johan Van Der Sloot?" Members of the Arkansas Razorbacks football team, including quarterback Ryan Mallett, delivered pizzas to Arkansas students who were camping out for tickets to the Alabama-Arkansas game. (Insert joke about getting an Arkansas grad off your front porch joke here.) (Friends of the Program)

Aaron Murray could've been a Gator. The Georgia quarterback was recruited by Dan Mullen when he was Florida's offensive coordinator. The now Mississippi St. head coach will see Murray face off against his team Saturday night, seen as a must-win for UGA. (Atlanta Journal-Constitution)

Zach Mettinberger will visit LSU on November 20. The former Georgia QB who was kicked off after being arrested for sexual battery charges will visit Baton Rouge for the Ole Miss-LSU game. Hide your kids, hide your wife. (The Town Talk)

Thursday, September 23, 2010

Covering Dixie Like Mildew: Georgia, Tennessee, and...Red Lobster?

The natives in the Bulldog Nation are getting restless. With Willie Martinez gone, it looks like offensive coordinator Mike Bobo is the new scapegoat for Dawg fans who are just not ready yet to throw Mark Richt under the bus. (Dawg Sports)

A.J. Green climbs Mel Kiper's Board. Green jumps from no. 4 to no. 3 on Kiper's draft board. (ESPN)

The Tennessee youth movement. Complete with a photoshopped fan Derek Dooley probably doesn't want hanging around Neyland Stadium. (Rocky Top Talk)

More Cowbell news. Yet another look at the Mississippi State obsession with cowbells. (SEC Nation)

Auburn gets physical. Gene Chizik  is challenging the Tigers to play more physical this week leading up to their game against South Carolina. (

Game over? Computer simulations of the Arkansas-Alabama game have Alabama coming out on top 80% of the time. (Arkansas Expats)

Did you hear the one about the Kentucky wide receiver  and the Red Lobster employee? Red Lobster may be barring servers from bringing up sports when talking to their customers after one server inadvertently insulted Kentucky WR  Randall Cobb. (Sports By Brooks)

Star Wars geeks in a Tauntaun sleeping bag race? Star Wars geeks in a Tauntaun sleeping bag race.

A Tauntaun sleeping bag race. I'm not going to even try to explain this one to non-Star Wars fans.

Just know it happened at Dragon*Con 2010 in Atlanta. And that the Tauntaun sleeping bag was an April Fools joke that got out of hand and became a nightmarish reality. So there's hope yet for my dream video game. A survival horror game with Snoopy as a zombie hunter. I call it Resident Beagle.

(via Topless Robot)

Wednesday, September 22, 2010

Erin Andrews and Ryan Mallett together

Two overrated people looking overrated together.
Hey Erin, after all you're issues with stalkers, do you really want to stand that close to the world's most famous Johan Van Der Sloot lookalike? 

As usual LSUFreek's makes anything Ryan Mallett better. You'll just have to click here to see it. One of the Freek's more subtle works, to be sure.

(via EDSBS)

The Robbie Cladwell Quote of the day

What are Vanderbilt head football coach Robbie Caldwell's plans for Saturday during Vanderbilt's week off? Same as any other football.  Of course, his wife has other ideas.

“I’ve got all them honey-dos. I’ve got to aerate the yard and throw out some grass seed. But believe you me, I’m going to throw me something on the grill and watch me a little bit (of football) and laugh at everybody else having all the pressure on them that day.” 

Caldwell is probably one of the most down-to-earth guys in the NCAA. Much to the chagrin of the Paul Finebalms of the world. 

(via ESPN)

Covering Dixie Like Mildew: Alabama, Georgia, and...Lynyrd Skynyrd?

Trent Richardson as Alabama's kickoff returner is "scary." Because Tony Barnhart says so. (Mr. College Football)

SEC Championship nightmare scenario: Auburn vs. South Carolina. Well, at least the South Carolina part. Luckily for the SEC, both teams play other this weekend, with hopes that one knocks the other out of the race to the Georgia Dome. (

UGA nightmare scenario: Road game against Mississippi State is seen as a must-win. (

In other UGA-related schadenfreude: Have you seen Georgia's tight ends lately? If so, call Mark Richt over in Athens. (Atlanta Journal-Constitution)

The Alabama-Arkansas game will be a "red-out" for the home team. In the immortal words of Rocket J. Squirrel  "But that trick never works!" (Or was it Mark Richt?) (

"But I Hope Mr. Bianchi will remember a Southern Man don't need him around." Mike Bianchi takes time from memorializing Leonard Skinner, the high school coach whom Lynyrd Skynyrd named their group after, to take shots at the band's substance abuse and criminal records. Maybe someday there will be a band called Urbyn Myer. (Orlando Sentinel)

Tuesday, September 21, 2010

Ryan Mallett meets...M.C. Hammer?

Please. Kill. Me. Now.

Please, 'Bama, turn this mutha out.

(via Friends of the Program)

Covering Dixie Like Mildew: Mark Richt, Arkansas, Alabama, and more

(Covering Dixie Like Mildew is the SWRT roundup of SEC  news, with the occasional pesky Southern school from another conference.)  

Paul Finebaum says Mark Richt is on the hot seat for the umpteenth time. Shut up, Paul. (

Greg McGarity says Mark Richt is not on the hot seat. And since McGarity is the athletic director of UGA, he is a more credible source than a columnist from Alabama with the ego the size of the Vulcan Statue. (Athens Banner-Herald)

When overrated sports personalities collide. From Erin Andrews Twitter Feed:

"Off to Arkansas..doing a sitdown w/ QB Ryan Mallett on the big matchup this wkd.."

(Strikeout mine, needless to say.)

Rivals with tusks. A look back at the rivarly between Alabama and Arkansas. Only one guess allowed on  which team leads the series, even with subtracting forfeited/vacated wins. (Roll 'Bama Roll)

Just give him the darn ball! Who should be Florida's go-to player? Alligator Army has a few suggestions. (Alligator Army)

It's the end of the world as we know it. And I feel fine? Is Saturday's game between West Virginia and LSU proff that we're in the End Times? You decide. (EDSBS)

Monday, September 20, 2010

Is the Pac-10 becoming King Ghidorah?

Stewart Mandel's article on the rise of Oregon, Arizona, and Stanford in the Pac-10 has an alarming title:  "Pac-10 becoming three-headed monster worthy of our respect." Well, that's scary. Imagine the Pac-10 mutating into this:

King Ghidorah, the infamous Japanese kaiju. With three heads that can generate gravity beams from each of its mouths.

Of course, this brings up the question "If the Pac-10 is King Ghidorah, what kind of kaiju are the other BCS conferences?"

The Big East - Mothra

Mothra is a giant female mothlike kaiju. Appropriate for the Big East, since the most conference's most ferocious is the UConn women's basketball team.

Big 12 - Rhodan

A giant prehistoric birdlike monster. Also, highly overrated.

Big Ten - Gamera

Maybe the ACC would be more appropriate because of the  Maryland Terrapin connection, but Gamera is one of the legends of  kaiju and only the Big Ten would suffice for such a personage as he.

ACC - Megalon

A sea monster that faced Godzilla. Also, a bit of a wuss.

And speaking of the Big Guy:

The SEC - Godzilla

'Nuff said.


Sunday, September 19, 2010

Michigan St. head coach recovering after heart attack

SWRT's thoughts and prayers are with Michigan St. head coach Mark Dantonio and his family after he suffered a heart attack following last night's Spartan victory against Notre Dame. He is currently recovering in an East Lansing hospital.

(via ESPN)

Saturday, September 18, 2010

No, beating Georgia doesn't get Ryan Mallett back on the Ryan List

For those who keep up with Shirts With Random Triangles regularly, you may have noticed the slash mark in Arkansas quarterback (and Johan Van Der Sloot lookalike) Ryan Mallett's first name whenever his named is mentioned on this blog. That's due to the fact that he's a touch on the overrated side; being highly touted last year, while Arkansas lost to Georgia, Alabama, Florida, Ole Miss, and LSU last year.
You see, "Ryan" is a name for winners, heroes, and champions. Like Nolan Ryan, Ryan Braun, Ryan Howard, Ryan Sheckler, Matt Ryan, and Ryan Conklin. Behind those guys, Mallett just doesn't cut it.
So now that Arkansas has beaten the team formerly known as the Georgia Bulldogs, will that get him back on the list? No, because there were a lot of factors in that loss:

1. Georgia wide receiver Vidkun Quisling A.J. Green still suspended.
2. Team still in mourning for UGA VII.
3. Mark Richt busy updating his resumé,  and looking for homes in Bristol, CT on his iPad.
4. Georgia looking forward to upcoming road game loss to Mississippi St.
5. Georgia AD Greg McGarity down at Athens police station bailing out two more Georgia players.

Besides, Ryan Mallett will always have this to live down to:

That's enough to keep him off the Ryan List permanently.

Friday, September 17, 2010

Will the University Minnesota marching band serenade Lane Kiffin with "Rocky Top?"

There's a nice little unconfirmed rumor on Twitter that the University of Minnesota's marching band might be playing "Rocky Top" when the Golden Gophers go to USC this weekend to get under Lane Kiffin's skin a little. While this is worth a chuckle, it's doubtful that it will rattle a rattlesnake like Kiffin. Since lane has shed his frosted orange skin for a cardinal and gold one.
However, there a quite a few songs that would be more appropriate for the Golden Gophers to mock the Trojans with:

"Losing a Whole Year," Third Eye Blind
"I Fought the Law," the Bobby Fuller Four
"Give it Away," Red Hot Chili Peppers
"Take It Away," Paul McCartney
"Devil in Disguise," Elvis Presley
"Busted", Matchbox 20
"Money for Nothing," Dire Straits
"Liar Liar" The Castaways
And of course, anything by Milli Vanilli

(via Rocky Top Talk)

Covering Dixie Like Mildew: Meyer fed up, Gamecocks cash in, Vols ticked off and more

(Covering Dixie Like Mildew is the SWRT roundup of SEC  news, with the occasional pesky Southern school from another conference.)  
 Meyer is mad as heck, and he's not gonna take it anymore. Urban Meyer's not happy about the 30 arrests of Florida players under his tenure. (

We must protect this chicken coop! Under Armour and South Carolina sign a new $19 million dollar deal that covers all of the Gamecocks' athletic programs. (

LSU leads list of "Most Disappointing Teams" for SEC. FOX Sports list of the "Ten Most Disappointing Teams So Far" in college football this season features LSU at #5, with Florida at #7, and UGA at #8. (FOX Sports)

Recruits at the Clemson-Auburn game. A number of high school seniors and juniors will be on hand to witness the Clemson-Auburn Saturday, making the game a big recruiting tool for Auburn. (Track 'Em Tigers)

Festivus comes early in Tennessee.  Rocky Top Talk holds its own version of "The Airing of Grievances" against Florida before the Vols' matchup against the Gators tommorow. Surprisingly, it doesn't include the infamous Steve Spurrier "You can't spell Citrus without UT" quote. (Rocky Top Talk)

Bobby Petrino on coming back to Georgia. “I haven’t even thought about it,” Petrino claims about returning to the state he left in a huff when he quit the Atlanta Falcons' head coaching job to take over the Razorbacks. Does anybody really believe him? (Atlanta Journal-Constitution)

Probable Twitterized desctription of tomorrow's UGA-Arkansas game:

Arkansas at Georgia. #TDPassMallett #FGWalsh #TDPassMallett #FGWalsh #TDPassMallett #FGWalsh #TDPassMallett #FGWalsh #TDPassMallett #FGWalsh #TDPassMallett #punt


Thursday, September 16, 2010

Is the Black Eyed Peas at the Super Bowl a good thing or a bad thing?

Good news for football fans tired of acts from the Jurassic Rock era headlining the Super Bowl Halftime Show: According to Sports By Brooks reports that Super Bowl XLV will apparently feature the Black Eyed Peas at halftime.

The Bad news for football fans tired of acts from the Jurassic Rock era headlining the Super Bowl Halftime Show: According to Sports By Brooks reports that Super Bowl XLV will apparently feature the Black Eyed Peas at halftime.
Honestly, I'd be happy with anything other than a return of The Who at the Halftime Show. With the possible exception of Kenny Chesney.

(via Sports By Brooks)

Your Ricky Stanzi "America, Love It or Leave It!" Moment of the Day: The inside skinny on the Iowa Senior poster.

Want to know the story behind the Iowa Hawkeye 2010 seniors' "Hawkeye Football Nation" poster? Iowa fullback Brett Morse give some of the background on the epic poster (which hasn't been officially been released yet, apparently).

And here's the Pat Angrier tattoo mentioned in the article in all its glory.

(via The (Cedar Rapids)Gazette, Off Tackle Empire)

Covering Dixie Like Mildew: South Carolina-Auburn, A.J. Green, Alabama and more

(Covering Dixie Like Mildew is the SWRT roundup of SEC  news, with the occasional pesky Southern school from another conference.)  
Chickens and Plainsmen in 3-D. ESPN3D will feature the South Carolina-Auburn game on September 25. This weekend's Clemson-Auburn will also be shown in ESPN3D. (Friends of the Program, ESPN Media Zone)

Orange heart gold pants? Auburn may or may not be be wearing blue pants and/or blue helmets against South Carolina on Saturday. Mark Richt wishes the Tigers good luck on that. (Track 'Em Tigers)

From the "There's a possibility but no chance" dept. The NCAA will hear Georgia's appeal over A.J. Green's suspension on Friday. (Atlanta Journal-Constitution

But wait, the A.J. Green story gets worse. Chris Hawkins, the former UNC player whom Green sold his jersey to also faces charges from a 2009 drug arrest in Georgia. (ESPN, Team Speed Kills)

Arkansas' Achilles' heel? The Razorbacks have been plagued with turnovers in the first two games of the season. Georgia's ability to score on turnovers may be the Dawgs only chance against the Hogs. (

ABC punks Alabama. If you are an Alabama fan and like outside the Southeast you're getting punked by ABC. The Alabama-Duke game will only be broadcast in the Southeast region. 'Bama fans in the rest of the country will have to check the came out on ESPN3. (Roll 'Bama Roll)

How many arrests are too many arrests? The Orlando Sentinel counts 30 Florida Gators who have been arrested for "misdemeanor and felony charges," not counting minor traffic incidents. Only six players were arrested for impersonating a Georgia Bulldog  alcohol or  DUI/traffic related incidents. (Orlando Sentinel)

Factoid of the day. Joker Phillips is 2-0 in his first two games as Kentucky head coach. The last Wildcat head coach to pull that off? Bear Bryant. (Leather Helmet Blog)

The Robbie Cladwell Tweet of the day

Vanderbilt head football coach Robbie Caldwell's latest tweet is a bit of a puzzler.

"Team meeting at 7am to practice getting up for early pre-game meal. Headed to Oxford for our first road trip. Come join us."

So, did Caldwell forget to put a semicolon there? Or are the Commodores seriously getting up early to practice for a pre-game meal? Do football players really need to practice eating, or are Vanderbilt's eating habits as bad as Tennessee's "shower discipline?" So bad that Caldwell needs to teach them proper etiquette at the dinner table?  The mind boggles at the possibilities. 

(via Robbie Caldwell's Twitter feed)

Wednesday, September 15, 2010

Shirts Without Random Triangles: Yes, there's a Chris Rainey shirt.

Yes, this Tennessee anti-Florida shirt referencing Chris Rainey exists, sadly. I'm sure Derek Dooley wouldn't approve.

(Image on back of shirt  lightly edited to blur out word you wouldn't say in front of your mama. Though the reference to His Hairness is awesome.)

(via Clay Travis on Twitter)

Your Ricky Stanzi "America, Love It or Leave It!" Moment of the Day: Iowa loves America

Iowa's senior poster plays off of the post-Orange Bowl "If you don't love it, leave it! USA #1!" declaration that made Ricky Stanzi America's Quarterback.

It's nice to see Stanzi being humble and standing in the background, by the way. It shows Stanzi's amazing character. USC probably wishes Reggie "Milli Vanilli" Bush had Stanzi's character right now.
Lesser institutes of higher learning, such as Harvard or Purdue, would cringe at Stanzi's comments. Not so Iowa. They embrace such pro-American declarations. That's why I'd send my kids (if I had them) to Iowa any day of the week over Harvard.

(via Black Heart Gold Pants)

Covering Dixie Like Mildew: Alabama, South Carolina, UGA, and more.

(Covering Dixie Like Mildew is the SWRT roundup of SEC  news, with the occasional pesky Southern school from another conference.)  

Ingram's back. Alabama will have Mark Ingram back when it faces Duke on Saturday. (Team Speed Kills)

Weslye Saunders won't be back. South Carolina has dismissed Weslye Saunders for his involvement for violating NCAA rules involving that infamous party in Miami. (

Urban Meyer needs to dismiss accused stalker Chris Rainey from the Florida Gators permanently. Because Mike Bianchi says so. (Orlando Sentinel)

Crying over spilt milk, Georgia Style. UGA defensive coordinator Todd Gratham is trading verbal jabs with Steve Spurrier after his South Carolina Gamecocks humiliated Georgia last Saturday. Shouldn't you be more focused on stopping Arkansas and Ryan Mallett, Todd? (Atlanta Journal-Constitution)

Arkansas' Ryan Mallett described by his father as being "a happy kid." Isn't that how most serial killers and people who shoot up their workplaces are described?  (New York Times)

Things getting rockier for Rocky Top basketball? There are reports that Bruce Pearl possibly did more than just make one to many phone calls to recruits. He might have entertained a couple of recruits at his home. (The Dagger)

With Alabama at number one, Paul Finebaum declares that "order is restored." Shut up, Paul. (

Glee takes on Jay-Z's "Empire State of Mind"

Please. Kill. Me. Now.

When I was younger I burst my eardrum with a Q-tip. Luckily, there wasn't any loss of hearing as a result of it. Now I wish there has been. In both ears.

(via Warming Glow)

Big Tentacles: Big Ten Network, a double down on Iowa, Wisconsin, and more

(Big Tentacles is the SWRT look at the Big Ten and the teams it not-so-secretly covets.)  
 The Big Ten Network reportedly brings in $70 million a year for the Big Ten conference. That breaks down to about $35 million from Ro*Tel ads , and $35 million from Barbasol ads. (Eleven Warriors)

Georgia Bulldog football player impersonation of the day. Iowa wrestling team member Brooks Kopsa was arrested for public intoxication after the Iowa-Iowa St. football game last Saturday. (Black Heart Gold Pants)

Iowa's Tyler Sash channels Yogi Berra. The Hawkeye strong safety on traveling to Arizona for a game against the Wildcats:

“Everybody’s making this big deal of going west,” Sash said. “I feel like it’s just the opposite of going east.”

(Hawk Central)

Badgers face a familiar "Threet." Wisconsin is somewhat familiar with the quarterback for Arizona State, their opponent for Saturday. He's Stephen Threet, who transferred to Arizona St. from Michigan. (Bucky's 5th Quarter)

Speaking of transfers from Michigan, Michigan defensive end Anthony LaLota is rumored to be transferring to frequently mentioned Big Ten tentacle target Rutgers. (On the Banks)

#2 with a bullet. Minnesota head coach Tim Brewster is at number two on Coaches Hot Seat Blog's "Coaches Hot Seat Rankings."  (Coaches Hot Seat Blog)

Nittany Lions on ice? Penn State is reportedly adding men's and women's ice hockey as varsity sports. Cool, a new target for Hockeybear. (Black Shoe Diaries)

Pitt Panther arrested for DUI-related auto accident, pulls "Do you know who I am?" card

Pitt reserve tailback Jason Douglas had been indefinetly suspended after being "charged with aggravated assault with a vehicle while DUI and being involved in an accident that resulted in personal injury, as well as a misdemeanor charge of driving while under the influence of alcohol or a controlled substance and a summary underage drinking charge." The victim of the accident reportedly "suffered head and neck injuries."
Even worse, Douglas is reported to have attempted to pull the "Do you know who I am?" card.
"Police said he was slow to comply with their orders to exit the vehicle, and when he spoke without prompting, he said, "Hey, I play for Pitt football. Please, don't arrest me," according to the affidavit that supports his arrest."
Dave Wannstedt is probably none too pleased by this. This suspension might end up a permanent one. 

Will 2010 be 2004 all over again? Or worse, 1993?

Tony Barnhart presents today's BCS nightmare scenario involving Alabama, Ohio State, and the media's new frenemy, Boise St.

"1. I know it’s early, but it’s starting to look like 2004 again: Remember 2004? Well Auburn sure does. That was the year that USC and Oklahoma started 1-2 in the polls and never lost. Auburn started at No. 17, got to be No. 2 for a week, but in the end it was USC and Oklahoma playing for the championship with Auburn playing the odd man out.
Have you looked at the gap between Alabama, Ohio State, and everybody else in the coaches poll? Alabama got 55 first-place votes after its impressive win over Penn State. Ohio State handled Miami easily and got the other four first-place votes. There are 132 points between No. 2 Ohio State and No. 3 Boise State. That is a very wide gap.
 Here is the point: If Alabama and Ohio State win out, I don’t think anybody, including Boise, cracks the top two.
Again, I know it’s early.  It’s just something to think about."

Oh, Barnhart had to bring up Auburn in 2004 again, didn't he? Even worse, the mention brings up an even worse nightmare scenario dating back eleven years earlier than that in 1993.
Back then, Auburn went 11-0 under first year head coach Terry Bowden. But since the Tigers were under NCAA probation, they were banned from both TV and the postseason. Meaning they were shafted from winning any part of the mythical "National Championship."
So why is this relevant? USC is 2-0 at the moment. Imagine that first year coach Lane Kiffin somehow manages to navigate the USC Trojans through the rough waters of the the 2010 season without a loss. The problem is of course is that the team is paying for the the wages of Reggie "Milli Vanilli" Bush's sin. (along with it's own apparent "I See Nothing" impersonation of Hogan's Heroes Sgt. Schultz.) So USC chances of going to the BCS are absolutely Zero. And it's doubtful that the Trojans could break the ice in the AP poll (which it's a part of) to get past an unbeaten Alabama or an Ohio State.
So 2010 could end up to be a major clusterflock for college football. Not only could there be at least three unbeaten teams at the end of the year, one could be from a BCS conference that's on probation. That will really give college football a collective headache.

(via Mr. College Football)

Cornfield with a Washington Redskins logo? Cornfield with a Redskins logo.

A cornfield maze with featuring a Redskins logo.

Quick, someone call George Noory.  This either means a) Aliens are stupid, b) Humans are stupid, or c) Both.

(via The Official Washington Redskins Blog)

Tuesday, September 14, 2010

Crossing the Atlantic: NC State, Miami, and more

A Wolfpack in sheep's clothing? NC State head coach Tom O'Brien claims the ACC is making his team a "sacrificial lamb" with scheduling the Wolfpack for a Thurdsay night game against Cincinnati. With NC State one of the rare 2-0 teams in the ACC against a 1-1 Cincinnati team sans former coach Brian Kelly, there'd better be a wolf in that lamb, not vice-versa. (The News and Observer)

West Virginia's Brandon Hogan arrested. Maryland will be facing a West Virginia team missing cornerback Brandon Hogan, who was suspended indefinitely after being arrested for impersonating a Georgia player DUI. (Testudo Times)

There's no "U" in Twitter. Miami head football coach Randy Shannon has banned his players from Twitter. (ESPN)

Can Clemson handle the heat in Auburn? With notable on-the-road losses last year against to Georgia Tech and South Carolina, questions abound on whether can handle the intimidation factor of Auburn fans in Jordan-Hare Stadium. (The Post and Courier)

Florida Gator Chris Rainey off the team after threatening text message?

Florida offensive coordinator Steve Addazio has said that reciever Chris Rainey is reportedly "not part of the team right now" following Rainey's  arrest for aggravated stalking. Rainey is reported to have left a text with an on-again off-again girlfriend saying "Time to Die B**** u and ur." Whether this is a suspension or a complete dismissal from the team is unclear.

(, ESPN)

Why does the virtual version of Barbara Dooley look like Hillary Clinton?

The virtual Playmobil version of Derek Dooley talks with his virtual Playmobil mother.

I can't figure why the virtual Barbara Dooley looks like Hillary Clinton, either. Especially since Barbara's a Repulbican. Either a) the place where these virtual avatars of Derek Dooley and Lane Kiffin and other Tennessee related virtual Playmobil-looking characters has a very limited number of character models, or b) Someone really has a bizarre and ironic sense of humor.

Monday, September 13, 2010

Penn State fans trash Alabama campus.

Friends of the Program featured a series of pictures of the garbage left on the Alabama campus by visiting  Penn State supporters.

Who do Penn St. supporters think they are, Georgia fans?

(via Friends of the Program)

Covering Dixie Like Mildew: Georgia, Florida, Auburn, and more

(Covering Dixie Like Mildew is the SWRT roundup of SEC  news, with the occasional pesky Southern school from another conference.) 

What Georgia's saying is that here's a possibility, but no chance. Georgia's appeal of AJ Green's suspension will reportedly be held on Wednesday. Mark Richt does is preparing his team's game against Arkansas "as if Green won’t play on Saturday," however. (Athens Banner-Herald)

Gainesville, Fl. named best college town in America. Athens, Ga. comes in behind Gainesville in second place, which is about par for the course. (Atlanta Journal-Constitution)

Auburn vs. "Auburn with a lake." Looking forward to Saturday's game between the Clemson and Auburn. (Track 'Em Tigers

Kentucky blog revels in Tennessee basketball's schadenfreude. A Sea of Blue comments on Tennessee self-imposed penalties over recruiting violations by Bruce Pearl and his staff. My, that's a pretty glass house you're building up there in Kentucky with John Calipari. (A Sea of Blue)
It's Ole Miss vs. Vanderbilt rivarly week. It's the week of the annual inter-divisional rivalry between The Rebels and the Commodores. Why does Jose Luis Borges' comment of "A battle between two bald men over a comb" come to mind? (Red Cup Rebellion)

Is Alabama's Marcell Dareus being "full metal jacket" a good thing or a bad thing?

Alabama defensive end Marcell Dareus is coming off of a two-game NCAA suspension for improper contact with an agent. Crimson Tide head football coach Nick Saban says Dareus is ready to go for Saturday's road game against Duke. But he had a pretty peculiar way of doing it

"In Marcell's case, it's just full metal jacket," Saban said. "He's ready to play. Hopefully he'll do a great job for us."

Uh, Coach Saban, is dropping Full Metal Jacket references a really good idea? I'm sure you think of yourself as being Gunnery Sergeant Hoffman, but do you really want to end up like him? You'd better hope Dareus is more Private Joker then Private Pyle there.

(via, Tuscaloosa News)

Chick-Fil-A doubles down on Kickoff Game in Atlanta.

KFC may have been the one to invent the "Double Down" chicken sandwhich, But Chick-Fil-A has just invented the "Double Down" Kickoff Game. Atlanta radio station 680 the Fan reported on Monday the Chick-Fil-A Kickoff Game will be adding a second game to by played on Labor Day in 2012. This will be part of a weekend that includes the original Kickoff Game on Saturday night, and the induction ceremony for the College Football Hall of Fame on Sunday. The Hall will be moving to Atlanta from South Bend, Indiana in 2012.


Hide your kids, hide your wife. There's an underwear bandit at Ole Miss.

As if losing to Jacksonville State and having students way too obsessed with a Star Wars character wasn't bad enough, Ole Miss may have a more serious problem on campus. The university reportedly has an underwear thief on the campus.
"Between June 5 and Sept. 5, Oxford police have dealt with a dozen break-ins where a suspect -- the same person, police believe -- has entered young women's homes, stealing only their underwear -- ignoring jewelry, electronics and other valuables"

He's climbing in the windows at Ole Miss and snatching ladies' underpants. There's a Jeremiah Masoli joke around here somewhere, but I'm not going to be the one who touches it. 

(via, The Commercial Appeal (Memphis, TN), Inside Higher Ed, EDSBS)

Sunday, September 12, 2010

Is Tuscaloosa the new Yalta?

Saturday's 24-3 blowout by Alabama against Penn State included a rare meeting between coaches Nick Saban, Joe Paterno, and former FSU coach Bobby Bowden. The Birmingham News' Kevin Scarbinsky had an interesting description of this gathering of coaching legends:

"It was as close as college football has come to Roosevelt, Churchill Stalin at Yalta. and
You decide which championship coach resembles which long-gone world leader. I don't plan to start World War III."

And probably because the majority of football fans outside of Alabama would put Saban in the Stalin, right? (Well, Black Heart Gold Pants would probably continue it's "JoePa is a commie" meme. But that's them.) 


Saturday, September 11, 2010

Greg McGarity needs to find Georgia's Manhood, and fast.

New Georgia Athletic Director Greg McGarity has a rough (pardon the pun) job ahead of him when it comes to overseeing the football program. It's not enough that he needs to put a stop to the Fulmer Cup winning string of off the field incidents involving Bulldog team members. Or make sure nobody sells their jerseys for $1,000 like A.J. Green. It goes deeper than that.
Greg McGarity needs to find Georgia's manhood. Not Georgia's swagger, mind you, but its manhood.
The past two seasons have shown that Georgia's manhood is seriously lacking. Saturday's disastrous loss to South Carolina is proof of that. This should have been the game for players to step up and fill the vacuum that A.J. Green's moment of idiocy created. Instead, the Bulldog nation was faced with two field goals. This is a team that was totally deflated over the week's drama over Green's eligibility.
The fact that Georgia seems to have cowered from the most trivial of things like alternate uniforms shows a lack of belief in itself. Black jerseys and black helmets weren't responsible for lad losses against Alabama and Florida in the past two years. They were due to a bad defensive coordinator. While Todd Gratham is a superior DC to Willie Martinez, he needs players that have a spine and show that losing is not an option.
McGarity and Mark Richt seriously need to find where Georgia's manhood went. Three years ago, it seemed that Georgia was ready to break through the mental barriers that have kept it in the middle of the SEC pack for the past twenty years or so. Instead, the program has edged closer and closer to the bottom, just above Ole Miss and South Carolina. Years ago, losing to South Carolina would have been an upset. Now it isn't.
Georgia needs to find what it manhood really means, and what it doesn't mean. It doesn't mean drinking and driving and forgetting not-so-trivial things like your drivers license. It means the willingness to take responsibility. Through that comes the willingness to take risks. The willingness to be bold when the situation calls for it, and not to be reckless at the same time.
McGarity has a hard task at hand, which doesn't seem to be getting easier. If the Bulldogs' season spirals too out of hand, he might be having to make serious decisions over the direction of the program which won't be easy. But manhood calls for that. Georgia needs to reclaim its soon.

Friday, September 10, 2010

Tennessee self-imposes sacntions on itself and Bruce Pearl

Even with a probable loss to Oregon on the horizon for Saturday, this should be a rockin' time on Rocky Top. With a head football coach with a combination impeccable character, pedigree, and hair ready to lead the football program out of the doldrums of the Kiffin era, things should be all smiles in Knoxville. But thanks to a new recrutitng scandal involving Bruce Pearl and the basketball program, it looks like Rocky Top is going to get rocked by the NCAA.
Tennessee has announced that it is self imposing sanctions on its own basketball program after being informed of a probe by the NCAA. It seems Pearl and his assistants were accused by the NCAA of "making excessive recruiting calls." On top of all of this Pearl reportedly denied the allegations to NCAA investigators. That's never a good idea.
Tennessee athletic director Mike Hampton announced that Pearl and the bulk of  his coaching staff will be barred from on-the-road recruiting duties. On top of that, Pearl and the staff have been hit with a loss of $1.5 million dollars in compensation. Three assistants will be getting 25% pay cuts.
Whether that will be good enough for the NCAA, who have been hammering athletic programs a little harder than usual lately is unclear. Also unclear is whether AD Mike Hampton's job can survive another serious hit to his department.
Whatever happens, a fanbase that should be looking ahead to a bright future is hit again with the realization that its athletic department hasn't had the proper "shower discipline" when it comes to running a clean product. 

(via Go Vols XTra, Rocky Top Talk,