Sunday, January 31, 2010

Another corner of the animal kingdom chimes in on the Super Bowl

One week until the big game and Super Bowl silliness seems to be kicking into high gear. At least it is in the animal kingdom. Princess, a camel from the Popcorn Park Zoo in Forked River, NJ, was enlisted to give her predictions of who will prevail in Miami.



Actually Popcorn Park Zoo sounds like a nice place. It's an preserve for wildlife and domestic animals that were mistreated, sick, or elderly. So a little Super Bowl silliness to raise awareness (and cash) can't be too bad.

Oh look, a poll!

If you look over to your left, there's a poll on which "sporting event" is the most fake. Your choices are: WWE Royal Rumble, NFL Pro Bowl, or the Winter X-Games. Have at it!

Stanford hires Willie Martinez?

Stanford has reportedly hired disgraced UGA defense coordinator as an assistant coach. I could have sworn Jim Harbaugh had more sense. Especially after reportedly turning down an offer from Oalkand to replace Tom Cable.
Speaking of the Raiders, this is probably how Lane Kiffin reacted when hearing about Martinez's hire.


Yeah, Kiffin's job just got easier, dangit.
(via ajc.com)

Friday, January 29, 2010

[BLEEP] YOU, MASCOT! Will D. Cat


Hello there, Will D. Cat. You're the Villanova Wildcats mascot. Boy do you look menacing, showing off all those teeth. Actually, you don't. You don't look too wild, either. Surly maybe, but not wild.
Will D. Cat looks like an old school college mascot, all covered with fur. As opposed ot some of these all soft sculptured and foam rubber cosplay monstrosities out there. He's a lot like The Penn State Nittany Lion, except Villanova cared enough to give there mascot a real name, while Penn St. didn't.
Then again Will D. Cat isn't the most original of names. It doesn't quite roll off the tip of the tongue, either. Of course Wild D. here dates to around 1950, much too early for the era where mascots had "hipper" names. Wait, mascots have hip names? Forget I said that.

Super Bowl Silly Season begins at the Zoo

You know that Super Bowl silly season has arrived when somebody decides to ask zoo animals for their Super Bowl picks. This one's from the Indianapolis Zoo. Gee I bet those animals aren't biased, are they now?



There's a Mark Wahlberg joke around here somewhere, but I won't be the one to tell it.

Thursday, January 28, 2010

Lane Kiffin-The Motion Picture?

This was going to happen sometime or another.



Actually it was more like 378 days, but who's counting?

Hey, it could be worse. It could be something like "I Am Curious (Tennessee Orange)." Or "Changing Lane Kiffin's."

Ask the Magic Favre Ball


It may either be the most brilliant or the dumbest advertising promotion on the internet. Either way it involves Brett Favre and his legendary/infamous indecisiveness streak.
Sears, the ever-increasingly irrelevant retailer, is giving America the chance to ask Brett Favre to help them make up their minds on their big decision. Just ask the Cute Purple Dinosaur for his advice, and click on his Magic Favre Ball to find his answer. Just be warned that it might take a while. (Cue The Smiths...)

Wednesday, January 27, 2010

Hey Johnny Weir, fur kills!





Johnny Weir, the U.S. figure skater who's gotten as much attention for his off the ice ambiguous lifestyle than for his on the ice performances is taking heat from animal rights groups. Friends for Animals is complaining to Weir and his costume designer Stephanie Handler about Weir's recent use of fox fur in his costumes. Weir's response:

“I totally get the dirtiness of the fur industry and how terrible it is to animals. But it’s not something that’s the No. 1 priority in my life,” Weir said on Tuesday. “There are humans dying everyday. There are thousands if not millions of homeless people in New York City. Look at what just happened in Haiti.

“I tend to focus my energy, if there is a cause, on humans. While that may be callous and bad of me, it’s my choice.”


Weir's compassion for humanity would feel heartfelt, if it didn't come sounding off like it was straight off of FOX News.

As for the costume...sheesh! It looks like Cosmic Boy's costume from the 1970's, if it had pants.





(Now if I could only get Sasha Cohen to dress up like Shadow Lass...)



(via Yahoo! Sports)

SEC fines South Carolina $25,000 for fan rush.


If you think the NFL is the No Fun League, think again. The SEC is trying to steal that title away from the pros. The SEC has levied a $25,000 fine against South Carolina after fans rushed the court after Tuesday night's victory over first-place Kentucky. This on top of a previous $5,000 fine after a similar win against Kentucky in 2005. The next fan rush would levy a $50,000 fine.
It seems the SEC is cracking down on any expressions of accomplishment on the field or on the court. It's just a matter of time before they get anal over things like socks or messages in the eyeblack.

(via GoGamecocks.com)

Tuesday, January 26, 2010

Who is Archie Manning rooting for? Who cares?


It's the dumbest storyline coming out of Super Bowl XLIV, so Dan Wetzel obviously had to do a column about it. Yep, it's time for the boring onslaught of "Who's Archie Manning rooting for in the Super Bowl?" time. Will it be Number One Son Peyton, or his old team the New Orleans Saints?
Here's the words from The Man himself:

“I’m pulling for the Colts, 100 percent,” Manning said. “One-hundred percent. That’s not close.”


End of story. Put your laptops down, sportswriters.
Seriously, does anybody think Archie's rooting for anyone besides his main gravy train? Peyton's the main reason Archie keeps showing up in commercials. It's not because of his years with the Saints.
Sadly, that's not going to be the case. The number of sports goobers who are going to pull this topic out of their rear is going to be numerous. Every one of them should get their credentials yanked if they bring it up. That and their Super Bowl XLIV press passes too.

(via Yahoo! Sports)

Super Bowl XLIV Halftime show gets less interesting


The already unexciting Super Bowl XLIV Halftime show featuring what's left of The Who has surprisingly gotten even less exciting. In an interview with Billboard Pete Townsend has revealed the playlist for the halftime show.
"We're kinda doing a mashup of stuff," the guitarist tells Billboard. "A bit of 'Baba O'Riley,' a bit of 'Pinball Wizard,' a bit of the close of 'Tommy,' a bit of 'Who Are You,' and a bit of 'Won't Get Fooled Again.' It works -- it's quite a saga. A lot of the stuff that we do has that kind of celebratory vibe about it -- we've always tried to make music that allows the audience to go a bit wild if they want to. Hopefully it will hit the spot."


Translation: It's going to be a CSI infomercial. The only way this could get better is if a CSI episode was airing after the game (the recent lingerie football episode of CSI:NY would have been perfect.). Sadly, CBS has decided to premiere the already uninteresting Undercover Boss.
It's at this point real alternatives to the halftime show would be really useful. Remember the In Living Color halftime special, complete with the infamous "Men on Football" sketch that pretty much destroyed Richard Gere's reputation? Or when the WWF had a Rock vs. Mankind match on USA? One of those would be really useful this year.
CBS really needs to hope for a close, exciting game this year between the Colts and Saints. Otherwise there might be a lot of channel switching this year.

(Billboard.com, Warming Glow)

Will Super Bowl XLIV be The End of the World?

Forget about the Mayan Calendar and the Prophecies of Nostradamus. It's the Super Bowl that foretells the end of the world. And the bad news is that time's just about up. You just have to see this one to believe it, folks.



That's just part two. Part one of this is just as bonkers, but not Super Bowl related.

Maybe they should've gotten R.E.M. to perform the halftime show this year. "It's the End of the World As We Know It (And I Feel Fine)" is beginning to sound more and more appropriate, especially with all of the NFL's unsettled labor issues and the possible uncapped season.

(via You Tube)

Monday, January 25, 2010

Stupidest Farve-related speculation of the day: Vick replacing Favre at Vikings


The Annual Brett Favre Retirement Two-Step isn't even twenty-four hours old, and the sports mediots are already acting silly. The Atlanta Journal-Constitution's Jeff Schultz is already speculating that the Vikings might look at Michael Vick as Favre's replacement.
Please. Kill. Me. Now.
Any smart person could tell you that Vick isn't what he used to be. Even then, he was more smoke than fire. Any attempt to make Vick a starting QF again has to be filed under the title of "desperation move." It's a move to be expected from a team with nothing to lose like the Raiders of Bills, not a team that was oh-so-close to the being the NFC representative to the Super Bowl.
The Vikings' chances of a repeat NFC Championship visit pretty much depend on Favre coming back next year. The more logical outcome of another Farve retirement limbo will be Tavaris Jackson and Sage Rosenfels fighting for the starting QB job. With Brad Childress hoping that Favre changes his mind once again.

(via ajc.com)

Sunday, January 24, 2010

Will Saints/Colts Super Bowl end up being Katrina/Haiti?


I hate to say it, but expect Super Bowl coverage to take a Hurricane Katrina vs. Haiti angle and blow it completely out of proportion. On one hand there's the New Orleans' Saints. It's been five years since Hurricane Katrina, but don't think the media's going to let people forget that. (And expect that kind of coverage to get worse as the anniversary of Katrina pounding New Orleans and the Gulf Coast gets closer.) On the other hand, Pierre Garcon (pictured)presence on the Colts were certainly warrant mentioning of Haiti's efforts to recover from the earthquake.
While not trying to trivialize these horrible events, the media in all probability will draw on them for storylines going into Super Bowl XLIV. With it usually comes the heavy-handedness when sports and "the outside world" collide. This can sometimes lead to great events being exploited and minor personal tragedies getting overblown (pick and Olympic athlete profile. Any Olympic athlete profile).
It would be nice if the media could go easy on connecting Katirna and Haiti too the Super Bowl more than those events already are. They can't be ignored, and there's still a lot of work to be done in those areas. In the end Super Bowl XLIV will be about two teams. It won't be a referendum on tragic events or the triumphs of the spirit that have overcome them.

Bobby Knight needs a makeover


It's seriously time for Bobby Knight (left) to retire the sweater. Or at least wear a sport coat over it. People get that the v-neck was his trademark outfit while coaching. But now that he's at ESPN doing the play-by play with Brent Musburger, It just doesn't look too cool. I get the joke, it's just not funny anymore.
Let's be honest for a moment. The sweaters look a little frumpy. They don't look like kind that's found at Brooks Brothers. They look more like they're from Sears. Or worse, Aramark.
Knight really needs to consider dressing it up a little more. .The v-neck at courtside was a cute trademark look. But if Michael Phelps was doing commentary for a swim meet, would you expect him to be wearing a Speedo? Probably not.
The announcer's table or in the studio at ESPN is a little more of a dress up thing, at least in prime time or on Sportscenter. Mike and Mike may dress casual for the morning simulcast, but when they do Sportscenter, they're both in suit and tie. Knight needs to consider that. Nobody would blame him for going a little classier look for TV. They might even thank him for it.
ESPN should at least try to get some classier looking sweaters. Heck, Knight could make a killing with his own line of them.

Saturday, January 23, 2010

Urban Meyer coaching spring football practice. Don't look so surprised


Least shocking news of the day: Urban Meyer will be coaching Florida spring football practice. If there are any doubts left that Meyer won't be back for the 2010 season put them away now. Meyer's health may still be an issue, but how could he not return with most of Florida's rivals in such disarray? Tennessee's a mess. Georgia's a slightly less smaller mess. LSU fans are about ready to run Les Miles out on a rail. And as for that in-state rival FSU...well, I wouldn't be planning any major long-term plans if I were Jimbo Fisher.
Who else is happy with this news? Lee Corso. His job is apparently safe for another year.

(via ajc.com)

What would a Kiffin and Dooley crossing paths look like?

Ever wondered what a Lane Kiffin-Derek Dooley meet-up might look like? Well, as luck would have it, The Lane Kiffin Show oh YouTube has made your dreams come true. If your dreams pictured Kiffin and Dooley looking like Playmobil figures, that is.



And no, I don't know why Kiffin is nekkid. And I really don't want to know either.

Tim Tebow Victory Tour for Fun and Profit is Off and Running

He hasn't been a graduate of Florida for even a month, and what does Tim Tebow do? Show up in a video pimping another college!
It would seem that with those silly little NCAA amateur rules out of the way, the Tim Tebow Victory Tour for Fun and Profit is on. The first scheduled stop: Nashville's Lipscomb University on April 17 for an event called the Don Meyer Evening of Excellence. Tickets for the school National Bison Club on January 25, with the leftovers going on sale to the general public on February 15. It's not quite The National Press Club, but everybody's got to start somewhere.
Here's how Lipscomb is promoting this event:



I'd use this time to say "(Insert obvious joke here)," but Deadspin already has.
Here's the fun part of this story; Tebow shows up in a video promoting the event on Lipcomb's web site wearing a Lipsomb purple and yellow t-shirt. (Insert irony here, LSU fans) Luckily for Tebow, Lipscomb University isn't allowing this little gem to be embeddable. Otherwise it would be dynamite in the hands of Tebow (and Gator) haters everywhere.

(via Deadspin)

Friday, January 22, 2010

Prince gives America another reason to hate the Vikings


His name was Prince, and he was funky. His lyrics were raunchy enough to freak out Tipper Gore. Not he's become a sad, twisted, shell of his former self. No longer funky, and even worse...he's a Vikings fan.
Apparently Prince's support of the team goes farther than just showing up at last Sunday's playoff win against the Cowboys. His (former) Royal Badness has written a song in honor of the team titled "Purple and Gold." The full song is posted over at the Vikings' official website.
The song can best described in two words: Purple lame. The lyrics are worse than your high schools lame as frak alma mater. And the music sounds like a fife and drum marching band. Prince sings it in a falsetto voice that just cries out "weenie" instead of "Bad Motherlover Football Team Headed for the Super Bowl" The Super Bowl Shuffle" it's not. It's not even the "Electric Glide," for crying out loud.
(via myfox9.com)

Michigan State fans go Sparta over new logo

Leave it to Nike to try to fix something that probably didn't need fixing in the first place. Spartan Football reports that Nike teamed up with Michigan State to update the Spartans' logo. The result which has been leaked:


The current logo is on the left, the Swoosh-generated logo is on the right.
For some reason, the new logo reminds me more of X-Men arch-enemy Magneto than Michigan State. It's more abstract, and without the gradient divided up like the current version it's harder to recognize it as a helmet on first glance. The old version looks more like a classical idea of an classical Greek helmet, and is easier to figure out. Orson Swindle at EDSBS is less gracious, and compares the design to a horseshoe crab.
As for the Michigan St. fan base reaction. Not so hot. There's the obvious anti-new logo group on Facebook, with over 6,400 members. Pretty impressive for a Facebook group a day or two old.
The new logo is reported to be officially rolled out in April. Long enough for Spartan fans to either get used to it or force alterations in the design. Probably more of the former.

(via Spartan Nation,EDSBS)

Jim Boulton calls out home run hitters


Jim Boulton (picture), major league pitcher and author of the infamous tell-all book Ball Four, has a bone to pick with modern-day home run hitters. In an interview with Shotgun Spratling of The Blue Workhorse, Boulton complained about the drama hitters have injected in their running of the bases. And no, he wasn't talking about steroids.

"I wish the players today were more respectful of the game, were more humble. Not so into themselves. When Mickey Mantle hit a home run, he put his head down and ran around the bases as fast as he could so as to not show up the pitcher, went in the dugout, and sat down. Now, a guy hits a home run, oh my goodness, his hands go up in the air, he's going around the bases, he just found a cure for cancer you'd think. He takes his time. He's pointing to the sky. He's kissing jewelry. Gets to the guys in the dugout, he takes a big bow. Then he goes in to sit down. Then he has to come out for a curtain call...and this is all in the second inning!

"I don't know who these guys think they are. They're just baseball players, and home runs have been hit before. I don't like the over-inflated thoughts of themselves that you have with today's athletes. There's just no humility what-so-ever; no self-awareness; no modesty. There's just no respect for the game or the opposing team. If they did that in my day, the next time up, he'd be on his ass. Believe me, he wouldn't be doing that any more. (Bouton chuckles.)


(via The Blue Workhorse)

Thursday, January 21, 2010

Ruffin McNeil to replace Skip Holtz at ECU? Insert irony here


It looks like Ruffin McNeil has landed on his feet. Joe Schad reports via Twitter that East Carolina is set to name the former Texas Tech defense coordinator as the its new head coach. ECU must have been impressed at McNeil's job as interim Texas Tech coach in the Alamo Bowl, where he stood in for Mike Leach.
Let's soak in the irony for a moment. McNeil, who stood in for Leach after the Adam James fiasco, is replacing Skip Holtz. Holtz left ECU to replace Jim Leavitt at USF. who was fired for allegedly going Bobby Knight on one of his players. Holtz was also the SWRT choice for the Texas Tech job.
On top of that McNeil is going to a team nicknamed the Pirates. His ex-boss has a notorious obsession with pirates. It's funny how things turn out, isn't it?

(via Joe Schad's Twitter)

Wednesday, January 20, 2010

It had to happen: Elvis goes after Lane Kiffin from the grave

Just when you thought you've seen every kind of anti-Lane kiffin music video imaginable, Elvis has to send a message from the great beyond on his views on the subject:



The only amazing part about this that it took a week for it to show up.

When cultural phenomena collide: Tim Tebow and American Idol?


It's stories like this that even make a blogger who thought he'd heard everything this past six months to go "Oh snap!" Janell Wheeler (pictured, right next to you-know-who), who may or may not have been romantically involved with Tim Tebow is rumored to be one of the 24 finalists for this season's American Idol. Mind you, there have been a bunch of alledged Tebow girlfriends out there, Including Lucy Pinder of all people.(I'm sure Ma and Pa Tebow would've been thrilled it that was true). But the idea of seeing Tebow and SImon Cowell in the same place at the same time might be to actually get me to watch the dang show for once.

(via Bumpshack, The Tebow Zone)

Knoxville attorney wastes $262.00 in the name of Lane Kiffin

(Cue the Carolina Liar)

While some Tennessee fans are trying to make Lane Kiffin's car crash into something worse than Chappaquiddick, other are finding more creative ways to show their disgust. An attorney named Drew McElroy wants to name a waste treatment plant in Knoxville after Kiffin.



McElroy paid a non-refundable $262.00 fee to file the paperwork for this. That's $262.00 he'll never see again.


(via The Sporting Blog, The Wiz of Odds, ESPN)

Finally, someone wrote a song about Derek Dooley

Sick of anti-Kiffin songs? Well someone finally wrote a song about Derek Dooley:



It ain't "Rocky Top," but 'tis enough, 'twill serve.

Tuesday, January 19, 2010

Jay Mariotti overreacts to Wade Phillips retention as Cowboys head coach.


It's a shame that Jay Mariotti (pictured) has stopped doing actual journalism and now relies solely on his first emotional knee-jerk reaction to a story. Take for example his latest overreactionary masterpiece over at Fanhouse about The Dallas Cowboys retaining Wade Phillips for another season.
To be honest, if you're read one criticism of Jerry Jones, you're read them all. Mariotti pretty much doles out all the usual criticisms of Jerry Jones. He meddles. He's an egomaniac. He spent too much money on the Heathen Temple to His Own Avarice Cowboys' Stadium. Pretty much it could be summed up by The Smiths' "Stop Me If You Think That You've Heard This One Before." Move along, nothing new to see here.
Which is a shame, because it would have been nice to get Mariotti's opinion on Adam Schefter's contention about the retention of Phillips. Schefter suggests that the possible work stoppage that could derail the 2011 NFL season might factor into Jones' thinking. "If the work stoppage many are predicting does materialize, teams will need coaches who know their players and players who know the coach's system," he says. "A coaching change at that time could be destructive, and teams know it."
Mariotti's blowing sports stories out of proportion can be fun, but when it lacks any sort or new insight it can get a little tiring. It helps a writer when he's writing to be willing to listen to other voices. Other voices than the ones in his head, that is.

(via Fanhouse, ESPN)

Monday, January 18, 2010

Bubba the Love Sponge out of wrestling promotion?


Alleged radio personality Bubba the Love Sponge (left) has been hired by wrestling promotion TNA (Total Nonstop Action) to do backstage interviews. That was before he decided to join Pat Robertson and Rush Limbaugh in the idiot parade and made stupid comments about Haiti on Twitter. He was absent from last night's TNA pay-per-view, and was told not to show up for work Monday morning.

On being told not to come to the production meeting he wrote, "Was supposed to be at the [production] meeting at 11. They called and said not come. This is starting [to be] not fun. All because of my Haiti comments. Sorry people can't handle the truth."


Actually Mr. Sponge seems to be having all the truth handling problems here. He also seems to be having a few employment problems with TNA.

Going to bed had a long talk with Eric b. I don't want to take over jbs backstage interviews. I may have to walk away. Cause I don't agree..... With letting him go. Now if I would happen to take those interviews over. All ready I'm the bad guy. That's not cool. Already some bulls*** about..... Going down and I'm in the middle of it. I have to take a long hard look at weather I want to really do this or not. Bubba"

The JB in question is Jeremy Borash, who allegedly was "taken off the air" by TNA. Aledegly being that some of this may be a work, and some of it might not be.

(Thanks to fieldy nuts at The Outhouse for help in tracking down sources for this article.)
(via The Outhouse, Wrestle Zone, PWTorch.com)

Vols still not over Lane Kiffin just yet.

If things keep up the way they are in Knoxville, Tennessee is going to have to change the fight song from "Rocky Top" to Carolina Liar's "I'm Not Over." Even with Derek Dooley being names head coach, there are still a continuing number of anti-Kiffin songs that keep popping up. The latest is by Renaldo Woolridge a.k.a. "Swiperboy"
Swiperboy is a sophomore on the Tennessee Vols basketball team. He's also a aspiring rapper who drops his tunes on YouTube. He's responsible for dropping that "Eric Berry for Heisman" rap from a few months back. Now, he's dropping the hammer on Lane Kiffin.:



I can't wait to hear what Woolridge does if or when Bruce Pearl decides to ditch Knoxville. Or when he decides to jump ship early himself and go pro. Then again, looking at his 4.7 PPG this season, he might want to stay in school.

(via EDSBS, ESPN)

Alaska Nanooks Polar Bear is kicking butt and taking names

Forget Sarah Palin. This is the Alaska native who our nation should be electing President in 2012: The Alaska Nanooks Polar Bear. Here is the latest of video clips featuring the bear which have become an internet sensation.



Do you think any Islamic fascists are going to try any crap with a giant Polar Bear as POTUS? I think not. The Alaska Nanooks Polar Bear isn't a wussy polar bear like that one in the Coke ads. Or like Knut, that cute little baby polar bear in Germany who is neither a baby nor cute anymore.
Give the makers of the video some actual credit though. Among the usual cheesy eighties songs was Laura Branigan's "Self Control." It's probably one of the most underrated eighties songs with one of the more underrated videos of the decade.
By the way, The Alaska Nanooks are an college team. Nanook is a variation of nanuq, the Inupiaq word for polar bear. How the NCAA hasn't thrown a hissy fit over this is beyond me.

(via Deadspin)

Duke football players and guns don't mix.




David Cutcliffe has to be going "I turned down the Tennessee job for this?" right now. "This" being after he dismissed three players off of the Duke football team. John Drew (top left), Kyle Griswould (center left) and Brandon Putnam (bottom left), all freshmen players, were arrested after reports of gunshots fired on the Duke campus. They've been "charged with felony possession and discharge of a weapon." And the Duke basketball team thought they were trying to look all tough in their Goodfellas inspired photo.

(via ESPN, Charlotte Observer)







Sunday, January 17, 2010

When cultural phenomena collide Brett Favre and "Pants on the Ground"

Thank you, Brett Favre. Thank you for making the most hideous culture phenomena of the new decade (possibly the whole frakin' millennium even) just that more hideous.



Just a word on this Larry Platt pratt: The media shouldn't humor this clown as refer to him as "general." Reportedly the nickname was given to him by the late civil rights activist Hosea Williams. According to the Atlanta Journal-Constitution he's never even served in the military, so he hasn't earned the title. He might have done a lot in aiding in the Civil Rights movement. But calling yourself a general when you're not is an insult to those who served their country to protect those rights. Not to mention those like the Tuskegee Airmen, who helped break the color barrier in the US military.

(via Awful Announcing, Atlanta-Journal Constitution)

Saturday, January 16, 2010

[BLEEP] YOU, MASCOT! Purdue Pete



RUN FOR YOUR LIVES! IT'S AN AUTON! Don't let him catch you! Run before it's too late!
Oh wait, it's just Purdue Pete, the unofficial costumed mascot of Purdue University. But dangit, he's just as scary as an Auton.
Just Look at that head. Even for a costumed character that head looks frightening. Those big oval eyes. The totally emotionless stare. That shiny fabricated head is totally nightmare inducing. Where's Jon Pertwee when you need him? (well he's dead, but that's besides the point).
Purdue Pete isn't the official Purdue mascot. That's a "train" called the Boilermaker Special, of all things. But we'll throw the train under the bus some other time. Purdue still lets this Freudian nightmare roam the sidelines and the courtside. Pete likes to show his sinister control over the Purdue student body by using them as his own personal wave pool.



Is this normal? I think not.

(apologies as usual to Matthew Gasteier)

Derek Dooley's Papa on Lane Kiffin

Want to know what Derek Dooley's papa, Vince Dooley said earlier in regards to Kiffin, a day or so ago before young Derek got the nod as Kiffin's replacement as UT coach?

“Well, Lane Kiffin has brought the signs of the times to an extreme,” Dooley said with a chuckle.


If Vince and Barbara show up at the next UGA/UT game in frosted Tennessee Orange it's serve Dr. Evil Michael Adams right for the way he treated him.
By the way, it turns out Derek Dooley's son is named Peyton. That should make the natives somewhat happy.
Anyhow, here's one last Lane Kiffin song for this week, with apologies to Soul Asylum:



(via Get the Picture, Houston Chronicle)

Friday, January 15, 2010

Meet Derek Dooley


This is Derek Dooley, who was until an hour or so ago the head football coach of the Louisiana Tech Bulldogs. He's left that job to take the same position as University of Tennessee head football coach. This after it seemed everybody and his dog turned the job down.
Derek Dooley is the son of legendary Georgia football coach Vince Dooley. He played football at Virginia 1987-1990. After graduating Virginia, he obtained a law degree at Georgia. Like Mike Leach, he was a practicing lawyer before becoming a football coach (Quick, lock the electrical sheds at UT). He was an assistant coach with various roles at LSU under Nick Saban. So he's obviously been tutored in he ways of how to leave a program high and dry.
Dooley became head coach of Louisiana Tech in 2007. In three seasons he went 17-20, with one winning season in 2008 (complete with Independence Bowl win against Northern Illinois). The other two years...meh.
Dooley was also named athletic director at Louisiana Tech in 2008. Meaning he's left the school with two vacant positions to fill (see, Saban taught him well). The AD experience might be valuable, as Tennessee AD Mike Hamilton will probably be out of a job after the Lane Kiffin debacle.


(
via Tennessean.com)

Derek Dooley new UT coach.

Derek Dooley's been hired as Tennessee head coach. The question now is: Will Vince Dooley be Derek's defense coordinator? Or will Derek pick his mom Barbara for the job?

(via Rivals.com)

Dawgageddon: The End is near?


The long Bulldog national nightmare appears to be over. Rivals.com's Tom Dienhart reports that Todd Grantham (pictured), current Dallas Cowboys defensive line coach, will be named Georgia's new defense coordinator. This coming forty-plus days since Willie Martinez was fired, and after several high-profile candidates turned the job down. How this will effect recruiting is up in the air. Or how Mark Richt and Damon Evans will spin Gratham as being the right man for the job after not being the first man to be offered it.
(via Rivals.com)

Thursday, January 14, 2010

Arenas charged with gun possession.


Gilbert Arenas if officially in hot water. ESPN reports that Agent Suspect Zero is being charged with felony gun possession. It looks like the Arenas merchandise will continue to be mysteriously absent at the Verizon Center for a long time.

(via ESPN)

Vols search to replace Kiffin off to a Rocky start.


Tennessee's search to replace Lane Kiffin is off to a rocky start. Phillip Fulmer says he doesn't want his old job back (but then, who really wanted him back). Will Muschamp says he isn't going anywhere. And now Air Force coach Troy Calhoun has announced he's not leaving Colorado Springs for Knoxville.
The search now seems headed for the direction of Duke's head football David Cutcliffe (picture), who was a former Tennessee offensive coordinator. His record at Duke in two years is 9-15. Then again, he was 44-29 at Old Miss, where he coached Eli Manning. He also coached Peyton Manning as an OC at Tennessee. So he's a better candidate for the job than his recent history would show.
If Cutcliffe turns the Vols down, it may be time to dust off SWRT's suggestion for UGA's search for Willie Martinez (which is still going on!) and call it "Who Wants To Be Tennessee Head Coach?"


(via Orlando Sentinel, statesman.com, The Sporting News, ESPN)

The cleanest thing Lane Kiffin has been called by Vols fans in the past day or so

Yep, it's another rap song about Lane Kiffin. Or as he's now called....Lame Kiffin.



Okay, it's not the most original name, but it's one you can use in front of your mom. If she's not using cuss word when it comes to talking about Kiffin, that is.

Wednesday, January 13, 2010

Shirts Withour Random Triangles: Well, at least SOMEBODY in Knoxville has a lick of sense

There been a lot of abuse of Lane Kiffin related merchandise up in Knoxville, and probably other places as well. But the Mitzi Sherill, manager of the Knoxville located HoundDogs store (a Tennessee merchandise retailer), has a better use for Kiffin t-shirts: send it to survivors of the earthquake in Haiti.



Someone nominate Miss Sherill for the Nobel Peace Prize.

(via The Commercial Appeal)

Kiffingate: When did Urban Meyer Know and when did he know it?

Pretty darn quick, obviously.



Don't think Meyer's going to be back next season? Tennessee's reeling, UGA is a mess. Vanderbilt is...well, Vanderbilt. Next season's going to be like shooting fish in a barrel.

Lamar Odom has his own line of shirts (without random triangles)


Remember the t-shirt from a couple of days ago with the Larry O'Brien Championship Trophy used to point out Los Angeles' spot on the map? Well Lamar Odom's Rich Soil Clothing features a variation of I (Heart) (Your City Here) using a ring for the heart (the one on the right). Though as it turns out, it's not a real NBA championship ring, but a ring that's also produced by Rich Soil. So a few cool points taken away there.
The shirt on the left features the Rich Soil logo. It looks pretty good actually. The rest of the shirts in the line aren't pretty much different from other shirts found out on the street. Nothing too bad, but nothing out of the ordinary.
Lamar Odom's clothing line isn't too bad. But do you know what would be really cool? A brand of Lamar Odom candies. It's an area he obviously has intimate knowledge in.

(via First Cuts)

Well, this didn't take long: Vols fan disses Kiffin in rap song


Remember When Lil' Wayne mentioned Lane Kiffin's name in a rap song? Well it didn't take long for Kiffins departure from UT inspire another rap song in his, uh, honor:



This one's going to burn up iTunes faster than Ke$ha.

Tuesday, January 12, 2010

Lane Kiffin...Oh Snap!


It's one of those night where you just have to say oh snap! And then that's followed by a further bunch of oh snaps! Lane Kiffin's bolted Tennessee for USC. Hilarity riot ensues.
No, I'm not kidding.


Lane Kiffin may have set a record for wreaking havoc in the SEC at Tennessee. He's just about tripled it by leaving.

UPDATE: Here's some (somewhat) on the scene coverage.
(via rivals.com)

The Knicks have been walking with a ghost


Well, here's a new one. The Knicks blame their loss to the Oklahoma City Thunder on the fact that they spent the previous night in a haunted hotel.

For two days, several players had trouble sleeping because they were convinced that their downtown hotel is haunted.

"I definitely believe it," Jared Jeffries said. "The place is haunted. It's scary."

Eddy Curry claims he slept for only two hours Sunday night because he couldn't stop thinking about ghosts roaming the hotel.


So Eddie Curry is Tegan and Jared Jeffries is Sara? Or is it the other way around?
If the Knicks are going to start blaming their losses on paranormal activity, maybe it's time that they got someone on the team that can handle such matters:



(via New York Daily News, Deadspin)

Dawgageddon: David Pollack uses his delusion, calls for VanGorder to be hired


Its starting to get bad out there for the Bulldog Nation. Get the Picture is already comparing the search for Willie Martinez's replacement to the Iran Hostage Crisis, for crying out loud.
Then there is the sad feeling that the search for a new DC is starting to take a turn for the delusional. Georgia legend (and current sports radio jock) David Pollack has been spending the morning pimping tweeting that The Dawgs should ask former Dawg DC/current Falcons DC Brian VanGorder to return to the fold. He's starting to sound like the Hawks fans who would call up the fledgling sports radio stations in Atlanta claiming the solution to all the Hawks problems was to bring back Dominique Wilkins.
It makes just as much sense for VanGorder to come back to Georgia as it did Kirby Smart to leave Alabama for the DC job. It not only is a lateral move, it just might be a step backward for VanGorder. If he makes any type of lateral moves, it will probably be to another NFL team. Or maybe to USC if those Jack Del Rio offered the head coaching job stories are true. Otherwise, any voluntary separation from the Falcons will probably be for another chance as a head coach somewhere. (Translation: Don't be surprised if his name turns up on the list to replace Mark Richt someday. Hopefully not any day soon.)
The next thing you know the DN will be calling for Vince Dooley to be brought back to replace either Damon Evans Mark Richt. Oh dang, I just gave them an idea...

(via Get the Picture, Yahoo! Sports)

Monday, January 11, 2010

Jay Mariotti overreacts to Mark McGwire





It didn't take long for the Snotty Sports Writers of America to come down on Mark McGwire. It probably took even less time for Jay Mariotti, the King of All Snotty Sports Writers to ring in with his overblown condemnation.
So what should we do now, people? Forgive him, embrace him with a collective hug and point him directly to the Hall of Fame? What Mark McGwire admitted Monday should have been said with no filters and all exclamation points back in March 2005, inside Room 2154 of the Rayburn Building on Capitol Hill, where he had an opportunity to tell the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth at a monumental Congressional hearing.

Instead, he just perpetuated his long-running lie about steroids and lost his reputation and credibility forever.


Forever? Forever ever? In a country where Watergate bungler burglar G. Gordon Liddy has his own radio talk show? Where Brittney Spears has the mother of all meltdowns, and comes back with two number one singles, a successful tour, and an Elle magazine cover with her kids? Where Bobby Knight goes from chock-happy college basketball coach to lovable ESPN college basketball analyst? Where Charles Barkley goes from getting pulled over for a DUI to hosting Saturday Night Live? Where Madonna...well, what hasn't Madonna done?
Heck, Oprah Winfrey forgave James Frey and apologised about how she treated him, for crying out loud.
Of course Mariotti has to go further and announce he'll never vote McGwire into the Baseball Hall of Fame. Never. Never ever ever.
As a Hall of Fame voter, I won't check the name of anyone linked to performance-enhancing drugs. That goes for McGwire, Sosa, Barry Bonds, Roger Clemens, Alex Rodriguez, Rafael Palmeiro, Manny Ramirez, David Ortiz and all the rest. The only one who has a chance to redeem himself is Rodriguez because of his relative youth, the length of his contract and the chance -- and I say this with great hesitation -- that he'll be steroids-free for the final eight years of his career while eventually owning the all-time home-run record. No matter what he did before that day in Washington, no matter how he fares as a batting coach in St. Louis, the McGwire moment imbued in the American consciousness is taking the oath and saying absolutely nothing.

Then again, judging from some of Mariotti's other denouncements, he may never vote anybody into the Hall of Fame again. Hardball Collective suggested Mariotti's vote should be taken away, and it's hard to disagree with that logic.

McGwire did roids. He's not a saint. Neither is Mariotti. There's a reason he's a frequent target of Deadspin. But that's neither here nor there.
The commentators still wanting to throw rocks at McGwire are as much as the problem as performance enhancing drugs are in the first place. If Mariotti and all parties involved who claim they are concerned about the problem (MLB, the Feds, the media, etc.) were more concerned about cleaning up the sport than going after tarnished players like they were trophy bucks on Realtree Road Trips, maybe baseball could actually get cleaned up.

(via Fanhouse, Hardball Collective)

Gilbert Arenas needs a new nickname.

With all the trouble Gilbert Arenas has gotten himself into, maybe its time for him to get a new nickname.
So...goodbye Agent Zero:




Hello... Suspect Zero!






(Flash Forward rocks. It sucks that I'm having to wait until March comes around for new episodes. Nice job, ABC. How about slowing down the momentum on this show a bit?)

Dawgageddon: Kirby Smart staying at Alabama


It's time to add another egg to the giant omelet covering the Butts-Meare building. Kirby Smart has turned down an offer to be the new defense coordinator at Georgia, and is sticking with Alabama. It has been almost a month-and-a-half since Willie Martinez was fired. The Dawgs have already been turned down by Virginia Techs' Bud Foster and LSU's John Chavis. At this point its about time to press the panic button. There's the possibility that Georgia Tech could sign former Virginia Al Groh as their new DC a week or so after firing Dave Wommack. If Tech does that, expect some questioning on the competence of Georgia AD Damon Evans to handle his job.

(via ajc.com)

Shaq hands Daniel Baldwin the highlight of his career

Sunday night may have been the biggest moment in Daniel Baldwin career. And don't give me Homicide: Life on the Street or Mulholland Falls. Can those cult favorites really stand up to this?



Nah, I didn't think so either.
What's with the jersey over the mock turtleneck, by the way? The Fashion Police will not be amused.

Sunday, January 10, 2010

Shirts Without Random Triangles: Shirt makes L.A.'s claim to Titletown

Quite a few cities in America have a claim to the name "Titletown." But even I've got to admit that this shirt from EZ Lifestyle makes a really cool-looking case for Los Angeles:






When you can use a the NBA's Larry O'Brien Championship Trophy to mark your city's place on a map (and the Lakers have quite a few of those), you have a legitimate Titletown claim around here.

(via first cuts)

LT won't be on Dancing With the Stars anytome soon.

Don't be fooled. The LT here is Ladanian Tomlison, not Lawrence Taylor. Even if this is clip has a more Eighties groove.



What next...Phillip Rivers showing us how to do the Phillip Riversance?

(via Deadspin)

Not everyone excited about Tommy Tuberville at Texas Tech

It looks like early reaction to Tommy Tuberville as Texas Tech head coach might not be 100% positive:

Saturday, January 9, 2010

Tebow hires agent. Begins decent to the Dark Side


Tim Tebow is begining his decent to the Dark side of professional sports. He's hired Jimmy Sexton as his agent. Sexton also is the agent of SEC coaches Steve Spurrier, Nick Saban, and Lane Kiffin, along with San Diego Chargers quarterback Phillip Rivers. There ought to be great material for EDSBS and Kissing Suzie Kolber with Tebow attached to that group (especially Rivers. KSK kinda doesn't like him).
In addition, Tebow will play in the Senior Bowl. Which means there's one more meaningless college-related game left in him.

(via TIMTEABLOG)

Texas Tech tags Tuberville?


ESPN is reporting that Texas Tech is will be naming Tommy Tuberville as it's new head coach to replace Mike Leach. That was a courtship that didn't take long. The big question now is how good of a fit will Tuberville be in Lubbock in the long run. As stated before, Tuberville didn't have the greatest of relationships with Auburn's main booster, Bobby Lowder. Texas Tech, on the other hand, just fired a coach who didn't play well with others. It will be interesting to see what the big money backers of Texas Tech will make of him.

(via ESPN)

Friday, January 8, 2010

Georgia Tech fires Dave Wommack


It looks like Gerogia Tech fans have gotten their way. Georgia Tech defensive coordinator Dave Wommack has been fired. This was a couple of days after a "Fire Dave Wommack" Facebook group was created. It seems like the North Atlanta Trade School is quicker to frown on failure than Georgia is. It took the Dawgs years to fire Willie Martinez.

Jay Leno debacle shows why The Packers were right about Favre

The Jay Leno at 10:00 PM has pretty much been a disaster. NBC is reported to be ready to pull the plug, moving Leno back to 11:30 PM, while either a)moving Conan O'Brien to midnight, or b)giving O'Brien his walking papers. The later will probably cost NBC millions of dollars, and a few executives their jobs.
This is happening because Leno announced his when he was stepping down from The Tonight Show years ago, and NBC named O'Brien as his successor. A few years and several pages of legally binding contracts later, Leno decides he didn't want to retire, a year or so before he was supposed to step down. Meanwhile NBC had everything in place for O'Brien, and had (or had just about) signed Jimmy Fallon to replace O'Brien on Late Night. NBC was pretty much contractually obligated to have O'Brien host The Tonight Show, or be out a ton of money.
The Jay Leno debacle is proof that the Green Bay Packers were right about not letting Brett Favre come back. Farve decided to unretire just before training camp begin. The Packers had already moved on and centered their team around Aaron Rodgers, to the point they had already drafted a back-up quarterback Brian Braum with their second round pick. Drafting Braum was a bigger mistake than rejecting Favre's request to come back. Letting Farve back might have severely damaged the team's relationship with Rodgers. If Rodgers had ended up deciding to go somewhere else, the Packers would have been in a deeper hole than they without a post-Favre quarterback (see where the Braum error comes in?).
As it turns out, both Favre with the Vikings and Rodgers with the Packers are in the playoffs this year. But the Farve seemed to be fading in December, and his relationship with Brad Childress seemed to have some issues. At least it did until Farve reminded Childress who wore the pants in the relationship. The Packers are favored against the Arizona Cardinals on Sunday.
The Packers were smarter than NBC when in figuring it was better to move on. NBC is looking pretty bad right now, and multiple execs are going to lose their jobs. The Packers' front office made the right decision with Rodgers and probably will still have their jobs with complete authoity over the team (which the Vikings and Brad Childress obviously don't). And a brighter and more solid future to go with it.

(via Warming Glow)